Interesting Day

I started out by dreaming about cake. It was my birthday soon and I was deciding what kind of cake to make. I thought of Donna's hazelnut jobbie and really wanted that. I realized that for MY birthday, I didn't have to make a cake that was safe for my daughter. I could use eggs and butter and she just didn't have to eat it. So my mission became to find a good recipe for hazelnut frosting. Then, suddenly, I was in a competition. My assistant passed me a layer with a sheet of fondant draped over it. I tried to stretch it and smooth it down but it was slipping all over the place. He went to fix it and completely mangled the cake, which made my head pop off, but then when I saw why, I let him have it. He hadn't put on any frosting first, so it didn't stick. I smacked him with my spatula a few times and screamed that if he ever came near any of my cakes again, I'd break off all his fingers and shove them up his ass. Then I noticed a very shocked mother and son who were watching the competition. Oopsie. Well, you know these temperamental chefs. So I woke up thinking about cake, and what I might make for my birthday.

After lunch, I went and got my belly button pierced. I went to a really nice place in New Haven. They had a big waiting area with nice leather couches and a big TV (which was playing some soap opera). The piercer was so nice and he had three kids too. Turns out he was a big X-Men fan and when I mentioned the tattoo I'd like to get, he and the tattoo guys went mental. They said they had never done one but would love to because it was so cool. The piercer guy went and got a big glossy book of Marvel character drawings to show me. He was like a little kid. The tattoo guys were asking if I was going to get it. I said I had to find the right picture first, which I've been trying to do forever now. They were pretty excited. I go back in two weeks for it to be checked.

Anyway, nursing Angus with the belly button thing is quite a trick. So far, I've managed to convince him each time that the shiny new thing isn't really that interesting, but he also likes to wrestle, so ow. And yeah, ow. Ow. But it will be better soon. Some of my friends had an interesting reaction. They all said they wished they had a nice belly worthy of decoration. Good lord! Mine is trashed from the three kids. Completely wrecked! So what? I'm not going around showing it in public. I like to wear nice undies too, but I don't wonder first if the general population would like my big fat ass so maybe I should just wear white granny pants! I've never met anyone who deliberately chooses ugly clothes because they don't think they're pretty enough or thin enough to be worthy of wearing something attractive. Jeez Louise! Forget what your belly looks like. YOU are worthy of decoration!